I am getting top surgery the 6th of November. I realise, the closer I’m getting to the date, the worse I feel about my body. I’m almost constantly dysphoric, and I’m letting it affect me too much.

I hate that being FtM is affecting my relationship with my boyfriend, I’m easily annoyed with my littlesister, and my own company is driving me nuts. I get easily depressed when I’m alone, and I’m not motivated to go out.

And I fear that top surgery will just turn my dysphoria towards my bottom, as it’s already affecting me now, even though I didn’t think I’d want bottom surgery, now I really, really do.

At least I’ve got one thing off my mind; A really sweet guy from Germany have offered to have my family stay with them under my surgery, so we don’t have to pay for an expensive hotel or something :) So that kinda saves the day!

Anonymous asked:

constructinghabitus:

merman-dad-merman:

gendercube:

This is one subject that I will not be nice about. This is one subject I will not hold your hand through and try to sugar coat what I say. This is because the reality of ordering testosterone and self-medicating is that it can very well lead to your death. I’m not happy about this message whatsoever because I care about you - all of you - and you need to know better than this. You need to understand why this is such a dangerous and irresponsible idea.

Read More

I will literally reblog and comment on every post like this that comes across my dash because the scare mongering that happens in trans guy communities about self medding is straight up ridiculous.

Firstly let me just say that I think that the question of ‘what are the risks’ was answered well and in full so hats off for that but seriously can you turn it down a notch with the tone?

Ordering hrt online is a last ditch attempt for lots of people, usually after

You can save up money, you can get a haircut and wear clothing that makes you feel more comfortable, you can work out and try to build up muscle that helps give your body a more male appearance. You can find a therapist and start working on getting your testosterone letter and work on finding a doctor to fill that letter when you’re old enough.’ 

For lots of people this is the last attempt at staying alive so it’s frustrating to say the least to see posts like these keep going around basically saying that that last attempt isn’t an option. You are literally telling someone that this option doesn’t exist and it could well be the option that saves someones life. 

Seriously, think about what you are doing. Give the information about risks but also give information about how to buy stuff safer because 9 times out of 10 telling people just to abstain from doing something leads them to taking risks one way or another.

This response. I’ll always prefer someone to get blood work monitoring their hormone regiment, but I also prefer people do what they need to stay alive than potentially give up on life. This is especially true for youth who have the highest rate of suicide ideation and attempts among the trans population. We should take care of each other, not shame and drive into further isolation.

I really don’t think they are shaming anymore, but they are helping people make an informed choice. If they want to take the risk, they actually need to know what the risk is. Anonymous can make that decision now, knowing what he’s potentially taking.

And not everyone is comfortable being the one linking to potentially fake or contaminated testosterone, knowing that it could kill someone or fuck up their body forever.

image

Hello!

We are currently trying to keep the Danish Health and Medicine Authorities from making it more difficult for us to get hormones.

We want to change the system to informed approval to get hormones instead of a long psychological account and horribly long waiting time. We are not mentally ill, and keeping us off hormones can and will get dangerous, especially for those who have had surgery and doesn’t produce hormones any more!

http://www.skrivunder.net/informeret_samtykke_nu

http://www.skrivunder.net/informeret_samtykke_nu

http://www.skrivunder.net/informeret_samtykke_nu

Please, please, please sign or share or do whatever to raise attention, the rules aren’t made yet, and we can possibly change it with enough support!

It’s in Danish, but I’ve translated the stuff you have to sign:

image

entercacti:

Wow just looked at photos of me when I’d only been on hormones for a short while back in summer 2013 and damn I have changed. Sorta shame I’m anon here cause I’d like to share. Maybe I could have some taken of my legs soon. The amount of hair my body has produced on my legs are pretty impressive.

If I weren’t ginger, I would look like a fucking yeti

after-crisis:

When I worked at a non-profit that handled suicide prevention, I had access to the donation records. Each month, a specific man donated 15$ to our organization. It was like clockwork.. same day, same man, he had been doing this for over 4 years. It always seemed odd to me but I never questioned it… until I saw a note attached one month. "For Noah- Dad"

his donation was once his child’s allowance.

I can promise you, they would miss you for the rest of their lives.

for-transmen:

If you’ve been looking to bind, whether you’re transgender, non-binary, or a cosplayer, you’ve probably come across binders like these on Ebay, Amazon, or AliExpress. Usually they’re called E.V.A, SHO, Whatwears, or Ancient Fish King brands, all of which are apparently, interchangeable with each other. Ross is here to tell you that these chest binders are not much of a step up from ace bandages, which in case you hadn’t known already, are the worst thing you can do to bind your chest. So here’s the run down, from least bad to worst.

First off, the sellers are usually misinformed about why someone would use a chest binder is needed just from how they title them. Why would Lesbians want a chest binder (outside of cosplay?)? I don’t know, but most of these listings have lesbian in the name, suggesting that chest binders are for girls, not men or nonbinary. This right there should be a warning sign of a company that doesn’t know what they are doing.

The strapless binders’ model is wearing the wrong size for their chest. Their breast is popping out over the top of the binder, and I can personally say that with that binder, it is very, very, painful if you have a larger chest. After about 20 minutes, bruising and chaffing will occur, esspecially to those with larger chests or are heavier. In the worst case scenario, the breast will rip or pop as if it were cut with a knife.

Look at the materials used. These chest binders do not have any or enough stretchy material in them. Elastic or spandex is the best. On the ones that do have spandex, they don’t mention how much there is in the binder. This is an enormous, bright, flashing sign that the binder is NOT safe. Just how bad is it? Ace bandages likely have more elastic than these binders do, and the ace bandages can still kill you if they don’t maim you. A binder is supposed to stretch, be easily manipulated, and you must be able to take a full breath in them. I’ve bought and used two different types binders from Ebay not knowing any better, and I could barely take a breath at all. I did get larger and larger sizes, and with the same result. Putting it simply, their binders could be falling off of you because they are too big and still would not be safe. 
Now I can’t show you in a picture about the next part, but what’s probably the worst about these binders is that their ‘binding’ material goes all the way around the binder. Your binder should NOT have this unless it is made to correct back posture. Sports bras can, but that is better for again, correcitng back posture. So not only will you be binding your chest, but you’ll be binding your ribs, back, and shoulders as well. This can warp them and damage the tissue. 
So what does a good binder look like? I’m going to use the binder I’ve had the best experiance with as an example. The Ultimate Chest Binder Tank by underworks. I’ve bought two of these as I’ve needed them, I wore out my old one after a year and a half of use daily including at work.
So, straight off from the site, we know this seller is knowlageable about their target audiance. Chest binders are under the men’s section and you never see the word lesbian on any of them. The only thing marked for women under the chest binder section is a sports bra, put there because transgender men often use them for working out.

The infomation section on the binder isn’t just two or three lines, it’s a whole paragraph. What is this binder made of? Medical grade 70% nylon and 30% spandex knit. It says it right there and is readily available information, you don’t have to dig through the seller’s ads for cheap wholesale jewlery in the description to find it. The listing also tells us how much of each material is used, information you must have when buying a chest binder. My personal rule of thumb? If it’s under 20% spandex or elastic, it’s trash. Our listing also tells us how to put the binder on, rather than making you struggle to figure it out on your own. Size chart and customer reviews are readily availible on the listing and not buried under ads for other unrelated merchandise. 

Also from looking at the binder’s pictures, the front and back of the binder is made differently; the front is thicker and non transparent while the back can bee seen through a bit and is thin in comparison. This is because the front of the binder is made to compress and bind the chest and the back of the binder is not. All the binding is in the front, support in the back. 
Please, know the difference between an unsafe binder and a safe one. Save your money and avoid ones found on ebay. Can’t afford a binder still? There are programs for people who cannot buy one on their own or it is unsafe for them to buy one. One such I know of is the In a Bind program, they have fantastic service if a bit slow delivery time. Remember, this program is only for transgender men and nonbinary, cosplayers will have to go elsewhere or outright buy a binder.

for-transmen:

If you’ve been looking to bind, whether you’re transgender, non-binary, or a cosplayer, you’ve probably come across binders like these on Ebay, Amazon, or AliExpress. Usually they’re called E.V.A, SHO, Whatwears, or Ancient Fish King brands, all of which are apparently, interchangeable with each other. Ross is here to tell you that these chest binders are not much of a step up from ace bandages, which in case you hadn’t known already, are the worst thing you can do to bind your chest. So here’s the run down, from least bad to worst.

Why is a chest binder for a lesbian?

First off, the sellers are usually misinformed about why someone would use a chest binder is needed just from how they title them. Why would Lesbians want a chest binder (outside of cosplay?)? I don’t know, but most of these listings have lesbian in the name, suggesting that chest binders are for girls, not men or nonbinary. This right there should be a warning sign of a company that doesn’t know what they are doing.

It's too tight!

The strapless binders’ model is wearing the wrong size for their chest. Their breast is popping out over the top of the binder, and I can personally say that with that binder, it is very, very, painful if you have a larger chest. After about 20 minutes, bruising and chaffing will occur, esspecially to those with larger chests or are heavier. In the worst case scenario, the breast will rip or pop as if it were cut with a knife.

These materials are not good

Look at the materials used. These chest binders do not have any or enough stretchy material in them. Elastic or spandex is the best. On the ones that do have spandex, they don’t mention how much there is in the binder. This is an enormous, bright, flashing sign that the binder is NOT safe. Just how bad is it? Ace bandages likely have more elastic than these binders do, and the ace bandages can still kill you if they don’t maim you. A binder is supposed to stretch, be easily manipulated, and you must be able to take a full breath in them. I’ve bought and used two different types binders from Ebay not knowing any better, and I could barely take a breath at all. I did get larger and larger sizes, and with the same result. Putting it simply, their binders could be falling off of you because they are too big and still would not be safe. 

Now I can’t show you in a picture about the next part, but what’s probably the worst about these binders is that their ‘binding’ material goes all the way around the binder. Your binder should NOT have this unless it is made to correct back posture. Sports bras can, but that is better for again, correcitng back posture. So not only will you be binding your chest, but you’ll be binding your ribs, back, and shoulders as well. This can warp them and damage the tissue. 

So what does a good binder look like? I’m going to use the binder I’ve had the best experiance with as an example. The Ultimate Chest Binder Tank by underworks. I’ve bought two of these as I’ve needed them, I wore out my old one after a year and a half of use daily including at work.

So, straight off from the site, we know this seller is knowlageable about their target audiance. Chest binders are under the men’s section and you never see the word lesbian on any of them. The only thing marked for women under the chest binder section is a sports bra, put there because transgender men often use them for working out.

YES! Good binder!

The infomation section on the binder isn’t just two or three lines, it’s a whole paragraph. What is this binder made of? Medical grade 70% nylon and 30% spandex knit. It says it right there and is readily available information, you don’t have to dig through the seller’s ads for cheap wholesale jewlery in the description to find it. The listing also tells us how much of each material is used, information you must have when buying a chest binder. My personal rule of thumb? If it’s under 20% spandex or elastic, it’s trash. Our listing also tells us how to put the binder on, rather than making you struggle to figure it out on your own. Size chart and customer reviews are readily availible on the listing and not buried under ads for other unrelated merchandise. 

Also from looking at the binder’s pictures, the front and back of the binder is made differently; the front is thicker and non transparent while the back can bee seen through a bit and is thin in comparison. This is because the front of the binder is made to compress and bind the chest and the back of the binder is not. All the binding is in the front, support in the back. 

Please, know the difference between an unsafe binder and a safe one. Save your money and avoid ones found on ebay. Can’t afford a binder still? There are programs for people who cannot buy one on their own or it is unsafe for them to buy one. One such I know of is the In a Bind program, they have fantastic service if a bit slow delivery time. Remember, this program is only for transgender men and nonbinary, cosplayers will have to go elsewhere or outright buy a binder.

justdontwordshurt:

unfelt-feelings:

fatandfabulousmermaid:

stonewhite:

gogetthatbody:

k-lionheart:

themaidenofthetree:

I want you to imagine a ten year old version of yourself sitting right there on this couch. Now this is the little girl who first believed that she was fat, and ugly, and an embarrassment.

This is groundbreaking

this is my third time rebloging this today. this is so important.

I have goosebumps

because were all trying to heal the child that was broken

Tears

This show is wonderful